April 30, 2004

This is Pretty Damn Cool

Thanks to Archmage for Finding this:

Windows Remix

Wonders never cease when a creative mind has time to play.

April 29, 2004

In All Fairness

...I must also give credit to the feline companion in my life - Leonardo.

He was named after Da Vinci....NOT a ninja turtle or Di Caprio as some have guessed, because he is a work of art. A wonderful, affectionate kitty, he is always good for some heavy petting (LOL).

Vote for Bush, because he's not French

This is what it comes down to: what disqualifies one from being President of the United States isn't lying to the public in order to get them to fight an unnecessary war. It isn't fiscal irresponsibility. It isn't promoting censorship and doublespeak.

Nope. It's being French. Or looking French. Or having French relatives. Or being able to speak French. Or being reviled by neo-cons who try to make smarmy and childish jokes that you are French and anti-American.

We don't want an educated, bilingual President. We'd rather have one who pitches a hissy fit when a reporter asks Jacques Chirac a question in his native language.

We want a leader who puts America's interests first when it comes to our energy policy. This means reducing our dependency on oil, an addiction that has led us to meddle in the Middle East. Of course, we've done that. We don't want a leader who shrugs it off when oil barons courted the Taliban--while the Taliban was harboring a known terrorist who declared war on us. Nope. And we don't want a President who continued this dubious practice until January 2001. Certainly not.

We don't want a President who would wreck the environment for the sake of industry. Or a President whose administration would submit a proposal (for the third time no less) to Congress that the Pentagon be exempt from envrironmental laws. No, we want a President who was governor of a state that enforced clean air rules to the letter. A state that didn't let industry get away with polluting the air. Certainly not the former governor of a state with the worst pollution record in the US. A President with a record of environmental stewardship. A President who gives tax breaks to people who choose eco-friendly vehicles, like Hummers. You know, George Bush.

We want someone who tells the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. That's why the GOP went after Bill Clinton--because he lied about doing the nasty with an intern in the Oval Office. So I'm sure they'll be all over the fact that Bush knew there were no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq. I'm sure they'll go ballistic over the fact that the administration spun the 9/11 attacks as the brainchild of Saddam Hussein. I'm sure they will voice outrage that Vice President Dick Cheney pressured Iraq analysts into making their analysis fit with White House policy and plans.

We want a President who supports the troops. George Bush does when he says "Bring them on." Of course, it also helps to pay the soldiers, give them the benefits they deserve for fighting for their country, and to stop extending their tours of duty. Too bad the administration doesn't support the troops that way.

Of course, we don't want an elite snob in office like that French-looking John Kerry. We want a regular guy like George Bush, who cares about minorities and the downtrodden. Why, he fights for the one percent minority in the US. It's tough being in the richest one percent of the population. Nobody understands you. But George does. He feels your pain. He's working for you! He'll reflect on it during his thirty-third vacation since he's taken office in 2000. I'm sure that conservative pundits, being for the common man and all, will be happy to point out that your average worker can't take thirty-two vacations in three and a half years.

We want a President who will keep the government out of our private lives. Who will realize that the government cannot and should not force two people who love each other live as housemates if they are committed to each other.

We want a President who promotes equality. George Bush bashed those naughty Taliban in Afganistan for hurting women. And it worked, too. Women in Afghanistan are free! Sort of. Well, in a manner of speaking. Well, maybe not..

We want a President who doesn't emulate misogynist religious fanatics who think women are subhuman. Who doesn't try to roll back equal opportunity for women. One who works for the equal treatment of all women. We don't want a President who would appoint a wacked-out fundie to the FDA--a fundie who advises women with PMS to read scriputure.

And of course, we want a President who respects the tenents of freedom, liberty and justice. Who respects the separation between church and state, and who doesn't think he's on some sort of mission from God. That would not be George Bush.

But Bush is better than John Kerry, because he isn't French.

Well, that makes sense. Now, if only the neo-cons could give us some real reasons why Bush is better than Kerry.

We're waiting.

(brilliantly banged out by pinkofeministhellcat)

April 23, 2004

Pugsley

My dog, Pugsley is the most wonderful dog in the world. He doesn't bark, drool, chew on things, get in the garbage, or shed. He does, however, snore and fart. His "emissions" can clear a room! If I feed him the right food, it is manageable, but if he gets ahold of the wrong scraps or something, look out!

Now, there is a solution! I can only imagine...Pugs trotting around in his hip-looking little doggie thong that controls his odors. I have a feeling he would look ridiculous and not enjoy it a bit. In this world of pampered pets, what will they come up with next?

April 22, 2004

Omar the Wise

This was just too good not to share:

"when someone shits in his pants, every move he makes will make his mess worse"

Posted by Omar at this very interesting blog: Iraq the Model

Happy Earth Day!

PSA - In honor of today's Earth Day Celebration, here are some simple things YOU can do to help preserve our beautiful planet:



Recycle
Plant a Tree (or several!)
Buy in Bulk (less packaging to throw away)
Avoid Excessively Packaged Products
Ride a Bike or Walk if you can, instead of riding in a Car.
Turn off Lights & Unused Appliances to Save Energy
Have your Vehicles Checked for Exhaust Emissions
Grow an Organic Garden & Lawn - use only Natural Fertilizers and Pesticides

If we all do a little, it can help a lot!

GMail!

I am now CelticCross @ gmail.com (remove spaces, of course). Since Angelfire is dumping me (and all of their other e-mail users, for that matter), I needed to find a new one. Now I get the great fun of letting everyone know about the switch. Should be a blast.

April 19, 2004

Drive the New Ford Catkiller!

So, Ford comes up with a new idea for a web marketing campaign promoting the new Ford Sportka...only problem is that they kill a cat in the ad! I understand the concept - they want this little mini car to be seen as a little badass, but I couldn't help but cringe as I watched the poor little guy struggle. Now that people are pissed, they are saying that "no animals were harmed" and that the cat was computer generated. If that be the case, it's some of the best cg that I've seen because that cat looks absolutely real. I don't buy it...I think it was a real cat and they just don't want the fallout. They are also trying to cash in on the sensationalism by getting the word out about this car. I would never buy a fucking Ford anyway.

What do you think? Is the cat real???

Finally!!!

It is finally happening...Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy is being made into a movie! This brilliant book is one of my all time favorites, and has been around for years and years. They started filming it just a few days ago! ...and the fudge on the ice cream, kiddies, is that John Malkovich is playing one of the major roles! I am so excited! Oh, something to look forward to in 2005..

April 16, 2004

The Dangers of Driving in Rural Iowa



Out on the rural highways, farmers frequently like to travel in their very large farm equipment. ...and they go very sloooowww. If you aren't paying attention, it can be very bad. Look closely...there is a car under there and the woman driving it died at the scene. My guess is she was doing about 65 and the farmer about 15...

Have I been Hacked?

Somehow, there were some changed made in my template that I know I did not make. I suspect that someone may be messing with me (am I paranoid?). WTF? I'll have to look things over real good to make sure they didn't change anything else.

Yep, Today is My Birthday

Yep, yep, yep...sucks that I have to work, but arrived to find a HUGE arrangement of flowers and balloons. BBQ tonight at home. Should be cool.

April 14, 2004

Bitching & Moaning

Ok...I have posted a link to my other blog (the vent-my-anger-bitching-pissing-moaning-&-generally-ranting-and-raving-blog). It's with the other blog links and is labeled bitch, bitch, bitch

Europe is Screwed...or so I heard this morning at the coffee shop...

Before we get to it, the other notable thing about the conversation was that the person in question was struggling to remember the name of "some old Russian President... Boris... Boris... what was his name?"

Yikes. It was less than 5 years ago, wasn't it, that Yeltsin's presidency ended? I kept quiet, because no one likes some complete stranger dipping. Another genius chirped in with:

"Yeltsin? The drunk one, always drunk, that's what he's famous for."

"Not for being the first leader of a Russian State to be democratically elected, or for finally getting rid of the old guard of Communism? He did a bit more than drink vodka."

Oops. Spot the pompous and tedious windbag in the corner. Oh well. I've always felt sorry for poor old Boris, because I suspect that because he wasn't as pretty as Gorbachev, that he got a rougher ride from the media than he deserved.

Anyway, this gal went on to relate the following, which she swears her professor swears is true. That's all you need to know about the plausibility of this right there. Naturally it's a myth, but it's a fun one.

When Yeltsin came to power, he was informed by his security advisers that the Soviet Union had placed nuclear weapons - suitcase bombs - in 60 cities around Europe. Good grief, get them back at once, was the gist of what he said.

Only 32 were retrieved.

There the story ends, inviting us all to go "uuhhhhh....", and wonder where the rest of these are. Captured by the West, which kept them secret? Sold to terrorists? Or still there? Each option is hilarious to consider, but my favorite is the last.

"Right, Yeltsin has personally ordered the recovery of our hidden nuclear bombs from these European cities. I'm in charge, so I'm going to Paris."

"Bagsy Barcelona."

"I want Rome. I've never been to Rome."



"We still have a few left. Birmingham. Glasgow. Marseilles."

"Fuck off, I'm not going to Glasgow. Pfft."

"Come on, we've got to get these back. You, Stanislav: go to Glasgow, that's an order."

"Yeah, you get Paris, and I get Glasgow? How is that fair? We should at least draw straws."

"I'm in charge, and you'll go to fucking Glasgow if I say so."

"Make me."

"Oh for fuck's sake."

So, straws are drawn.

"Ha ha Stanislav, you got Glasgow anyway, and I got Paris. Ha ha."

"It's a fix."

"Grow up, and get the fucking bomb. The security of Mother Rus, er, Commonwealth of Independent States is at stake."

"Like I care. Glasgow. Pfft."

"You'll go, and that's that."



"Awright mate; on yer holidays, or comin' hame?"

"Is business trip. Please take me to Hampden Stadium."

"Right ye are. Oan a spying mission, ur ye?"

"What?!"

"Calm doon, pal, I just huv ye pegged as wan o' they foreign managers, ower here fur a wee swatch at the groond an' that."

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"As ye like, pal. Maw's the word. 5, airport pickup, oan ma way tae Mount Florida."



"Excuse me - "

"Aye, whit?"

"This is Hampden Stadium?"

"Aye, ye dobber."

"But... but... it is new."

"Rebuilt, intit? Not frae roond here, eh? Ye English?"

"No..."

"Frae Edinburgh?"

"No..."

"That's awrite then. Cannae stand they cunts. Good here, intit?"

"What?"

"Glasgow: brilliant, intit? Friendliest fuckin' people on earth, aye? Salt of, my man: salt fuckin' of. Sense o' humour an' that. Fuckin' brand new. The patter's excellent, naw?"

"Er... yes."

"Here, huv ye got a spare fag?"

Fucking Glasgow. I'm going home.




"Well, Stanislav?"

"It was gone."

"Damn. The Americans must have that one as well. Why their security is so good in these grim European cities, I don't know. Piotr, how did you get on in Birmingham?"

"Lovely. Very hot. Do you like my tan?"

"The bomb, you moron."

"Oh that... gone. No sign of it. Looked everywhere."

"Why are you wearing a sombrero, Piotr?"
Woo hoo...my dog, Pugsley, is now featured on Dogs Hate Bush. He really does hate dubya...he sometimes barks at the screen when his stupid mug is on there, like last night. I shut it off and we went to the park...much better than watching his moronic ass.
I am feeling better today. Last night, I beat the piss out of my old broken computer monitor with a broken rake handle. It was immensely satisfying & now I am sure that my neighbors think I'm nuts. I was a bit surprised that the cops didn't show up, though. After throwing the pieces in the trash bin, I went inside, smoked a big fat bowl and ate some home made beef stroganoff. I found my outlet.

I did create my ranting and raving blog, too. If anyone is interested, I'll put a linker to it on the sidebar.

April 13, 2004

I am filled with hatred, loathing and bitterness today. I am tired, frustrated, exasperated, disgusted, in pain, bored with my job, bored with my life. The darkness inside my head is becoming more prevalent as time goes on. I dont' know how much longer I can keep this shiny, fluffy, happy facade up before it breaks in two and the blackness spills out. little bits have been seeping from the cracks the past few days and I can't keep wiping them away for much longer.

Nobody gets it and noone gets me. I think a big part of the problem is that I can't express myself to the extent that I feel I need to. I have to find an outlet.

Maybe I'll start a new blog that is just for the sole purpose of ranting and raving and spilling out hatred.

April 09, 2004

Chocolate!

Since we have a popular chocolate-eating holiday this weekend, I thought I would share some interesting trivia about the tasty treat:

 There are approximately 2500 Calories in a pound of chocolate which is almost twice as many as a pound of beef or a dozen eggs.

 The craving for chocolate is determined by brain chemistry. Studies indicate that chocolate does contain mood-altering chemicals called cannaboids. But, you would have to eat 27 pounds of chocolate at a sitting to have any pharmacological effects.

 The melting point of chocolate is 90 degrees...lower than your body temp. so that's why it melts in your hand - Unless, of course, you are eating M&M's, which melt in your mouth, not in your hand.

 Chocolate is relatively low in saturated fat. The fat content of chocolate varies from one bar to the next, from milk chocolate to dark. The U.S. Department of Agriculture Nutrition database indicates that a standard bar of mild chocolate is about 60 percent fat. About 50 percent of the overall fat in chocolate is saturated fat, which generally raises cholesterol levels. However, the saturated fat in chocolate is stearic acid, which has essentially no impact on cholesterol. Other research shows chocolate contains a chemical called phenolic acid, which may lower the risk of heart disease.

 Carob is not any better for you than chocolate is. According to the America Dietetic Association, a bar of carob contains just as many calories and fat as a chocolate bar of the same weight.

 The average American eats 11.7 pounds of chocolate per year. Americans don't lead the pack, however - the Swiss eat about 22 pounds annually and the Danes eat just under 30 pounds a year.

 According to several studies on the relationship between chocolate and acne, it has been proven that there is no association.

 Although the sugar in chocolate is linked to tooth decay, some studies indicate that cocoa butter forms a protective layer over the tooth enamel. Also, if you brush after eating chocolate, the chances of the sugar affecting you are greatly reduced.

 Chocolate contains about 8 milligrams of caffeine per ounce. Compared to 80-100 mgms in a cup of coffee, that's not much.

 If you are a chocoholic, you have a chance of living longer. A December 1998 study in the British Medical Journal suggests that chocoholics appear to live up to a year longer than the chocolate-deprived. However, the results of this study are preliminary. Also, those who enjoyed the most benefits, with a 36 percent lower risk of death than those who eat little or no chocolate, actually consumed only modest amounts of chocolate: from 1-3 bars per month. However, even among those who ate closer to 3 bars a week, the risk of death was 16 percent lower.

 Studies have concluded that there is no indication of any kind that candy is linked to hyperactivity.

April 07, 2004

My Favorite Movies
(In no Particular Order)

Being John Malkovich
Office Space
4 Rooms
Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas
O Brother, Where are Thou?
Lord of the Rings (All 3!)
The Matrix (Just the 1st one)
Pulp Fiction
The Big Lebowski
Silence of the Lambs
Life of Brian
The Royal Tenenbaums
Rushmore
Reservoir Dogs
The Bindlestiff Family Cirkus

Today, I want to tell you about a tantalizing treat - the Bindlestiff Family Cirkus. I saw them a few years ago when they came to Des Moines and put on a performance at Hairy Mary's. They were incredible. Included was everything from (but certainly not limited to) spinning plates, razor blades, broken bottles (frolicked upon) and light bulbs (eaten), swords (swallowed) and lots of long pointy objects inserted into cranial cavities to the most impressive and erotic display of fireplay that one can imagine. They also featured a contortionist named Danny Boy who was simply unbelievable. The performance was intoxicating and made me want to dive into their van and go with them.

Philomena, the ring leader, performs with a very large bull whip with which her finesse and accuracy is incomparable. She puts several previously proven super-sharp double edged razor blades into her mouth along with a long string of thread and proceeds, with mouth closed, to tie each razor onto the string like christmas lights, pulling each one out on the string for display. She is nothing short of amazing.

Obviously, I am a raving fan of theirs. I saw them again a year or two later and the show was equally enticing.

If you'd like to check out some amazing video footage of these most intriguing individuals at work go for it!

The troup is based out of NYC (Brooklyn) and perform in NYC on a fairly frequent basis. They normally go across the country on tour during a good part of the year. If these folks ever come to perform in your city, I highly recommend that you open your mind and go see them. You will not be sorry.
Just found out that angelfire is discontinuing their e-mail hosting service. The address that EVERYONE has and I have managed to hold onto for years is going to be deleted by the end of May. That SUCKS! Damn it, damn it, damn it! So, I thought I'd look into the new google e-mail service they are setting up. Maybe I can get the same beginning to the addy since it's a new service. Now I'm not so sure...

Privacy advocates target Google mail

I like to keep one good web-based e-mail address so that I don't have to change if I move or switch providers. Hotmail sucks ass, so I'm looking for alternatives. Any suggestions would be welcomed and appreciated!
Mocha Report

Well, it's been over a week since I had a cafe mocha from Friedrichs and I have felt just fine. I am almost afraid to try one again because I am pretty sure it will make me sick. Just figures that my favorite treat would turn against me. Maybe it's my body's way of saying "lay off the caffeine, stoopid!"

April 06, 2004

Photoshoppers Attack Google!

love it!
More fun with Photoshop
These kids are Farked!
Fun with Photoshop

Oh, how I love Photoshop. It can be such fun. Here are some great examples of what you can do...

What can YOU do with her?

I especially liked the queen and the Marilyn Monroe. The whole thing made me giggle like and idiot, which is much needed and welcomed. I need to laugh like that at least once every day!

April 02, 2004

Ok...I obviously don't know what I am doing here! I have been trying to put some new skins on my blog and I keep screwing them up! Not sure if anyone has seen them...there have been some pretty jacked up pages published by me this morning. Grrrrr...

I'll have to work on trying to figure out how to apply my mood thingy and my own links to these skins. Going out of town for the weekend, so looks like it will be next week at the earliest before I can spend much more time on it. Meanwhile, it's back to my good ole' plain jane page. For now, it's home.