July 20, 2005

Malaise & General Blathering

Something is not right. My body has been sending me little signals, and I think it's time I start listening. I just can't pin it down to anything in particular...

A pain here and there for no apparent reason
Bleeding when I shouldn't be bleeding
Pain in jaw muscles from clenching
Back pain
Extreme fatigue during the day
Inability to get to sleep at night
Difficulty concentrating

I went to bed last night at 8:00. When I woke up this morning, I was more tired than before. gah!

Perhaps these are just manifestations of the extreme amount of stress I've been dealing with. Whatever it is, I don't like it.

We got our notice from the DHS notice that our "case" was completed and that no charges will be filed up or further follow-up recommended. Just like that, some asshat can call them up and lie like a rug, and you get raked over the coals, put under the microscope. I was relieved to see that it reported D to be a well-adjusted, happy & verbally advanced and expressive child who responded spontaneously and that he seemed well bonded to us. Well, duh. Anyway, our residence was presentable and maintained, we all appeared to be healthy and had good hygene and D did not appear to have been abused in any way. I guess we passed the test. Again, duh.

I have, however, never been so humiliated in my life. To even be accused and investigated for abusing my child, not matter how untrue it is, is horrific to me. He is our #1 priority, the source of most of the joy in my days. I can not imagine how anyone could abuse their child, but I know it happens.

Even though the accusations "appear to be" unfounded and nothing was put on our records because of it, we now have a file with the DHS and a record of the accusations is there. It makes me angry to the very core. ...and it is even worse because it was caused by a family member that we loved and trusted - someone we've done nothing to but try to help only to be rewarded with spitefulness, lies and betrayal. I guess that's what we get for trying to help this lost, insubordinate, illiterate juvenile degenerate learn a trade so he can support himself. Well, that person is no longer considered to be family and we will never speak to them again. The ties are severed. At least it appears that he's finally stopped calling us & making threats (even leaving threats on our answering machine - what an idiot!). Perhaps word got back to him that I've been looking into getting a restraining order and charging him with harrassment and extortion.

Still no income to speak of coming in from the business. The guys are working now, but it takes a bit to catch up and get a couple of draws from the new job to cover all the losses before things start flowing again.

I got to go see D having his swimming lesson yesterday. It was so cool. There is a huge observation window overlooking the pool, and I stood and watched him learning to tread water and jump in from the side for a long time before one of his buddies spotted me. Of course, after that, there was a lot of smiling, waving and general showing off. It was so cute. He's doing very well. I am so proud of my baby.

We have resigned ourselves to the fact that Lexi will have to be kennelled (some call it crated - put in her kennel) during the day when we are at work. She has been getting into too much trouble. I even tried barricading her into just the kitchen and den to keep her out of trouble, but she keeps getting through to the rest of the house. So far, she has eaten/shredded:

two shoes
a hairbrush
countless toys of D's (she dismembered R2D2 and beheaded Mr. Fantastic!)
a hat
assorted garbage
several water bottles
work gloves
my glasses case
A DVD case (DVD is ok, fortunately)

That's the short version of the list. She is used to being kennelled as her previous owners did, but I was hoping that we wouldn't have to. She has several toys in there with her to entertain herself. I guess she'll just have to deal as we can't let her eat the damned house. She could eat something that would hurt her! Silly dog. Other than that issue, she is doing great.

Well, enough blathering for today. Happy Humpday, peeps.


  1. It's unbelievable what some people will do to get what they want from others. One of my Dad's friends had his daughter report him for abusing her (even thoguh he enver laid a finger on her) because a friend of hers at school, who was abused, has a foster home where they buy her all sorts of fancy clothing and electronics.

    "I can't trust that you won't try this again" was the only thing he said to her since, even that only the once, and I can't blame him one bit. Fate saw fit to punish her for her act though and she got real foster parents who provided love and a stable home instead of material crap. She gained nothing and lost everything as even the rest of the family treats her with obvious concern and doubt.

    You knew you had nothing to worry about, yet how are you not supposed to wrry during a situation liek this. At least it's over and you can wash your hands of the reporting moron.

    Love your kid, live your life, and to hell with the critics.

  2. Celti,

    Glad the whole thing worked out. I'm on the fence with these organizations. On the one hand, they do provide a valuable service for those kids that are in dangerous situations. On the other hand, some of them seem to have this attitude like you're guilty and they just can't prove it because someone accuses you of something. Oh well, you need to move on and keep doing what you're doing for your kid, since it's obviously the right thing.

    As far as getting good sleep goes, I heard that the best way to catch up on rest is to actually go to bed at your normal time, not early, as that is what your body is used to doing. My wife has similar issues when it comes to stress. You just need some sort of outlet for it. Good luck!


  3. Good thing uncle Pup wasn't there drunk with a crack pipe when the DHS visited.

  4. Hey sweetie... there's something I think you need. Yes. It's exactly


    think it is.


    Feel better? No? Let me do it again and again until you spit something at me.

    And good luck with Lexi. I've been lettin' the poog out when I get home from work, then go run errands or go drink a beer at Geo's. He's been pretty good... mostly. But last night he shredded a roll of toilet paper and a new box of tissues. Sigh... just when I think he's ready... At least he's not chewing on my furniture anymore and paper products are easily picked up.

  5. I had no idea you were dealing with all this nonsense. I know how your feeling girl! When my oldest was born, my sister tried everything she could think of to have him taken away from me. I had the cops at my house once a week for MONTHS, checking him with a flashlight at nite because of her bullshit lies. They never found any marks of him of course, but still, what a fucking hassle. Finally she just quite trying, bitch!

    Do you crate your pup? Its far less expensive then what your thinking about, and they actually love it after they get used to it, its like their den, their haven. I crate both my dogs. I highly recommend it. :)

    Hugsssss you!!

  6. I can't believe someone would accuse you of abusing D. There should be some counter measures you can take...or even the agency. they used time and resources on a fraudulent and hurtful tip.

    karma's a bitch. I hope it get's back to him and his 10fold.

    poor lexi - I recommend lots and lots and lots of chew toys. kongs, bones, rope toys, whatever.

    sadie was crate trained. it never seemed to affect her adversely. now she has free roam, but I think she still spends most of the day in her crate sleeping. it's like her snuggly hideaway.

  7. wow, that just totally sukks ass! I've seen it done to other peeps to. There should be a law against false reporting, just like falsifying a police report, then that shit would come to a grinding halt. Fukkin asshats know that there will be no reprisal for making false accusations and they use that to get at you and your family.

    To me that is an extremely serious thing to do to a family, no one needs that kind of trauma in their life, it can have seriously bad repercussions that can cause a lifetime of heartache for a wrongfully accused family.

    He might just as well have come over to your home and tried to beat you all with a baseball bat for all the damage he could have caused. Peeps like that need to be taught a lesson, one that could involve the breaking of limbs...

    BIG HUGS for you sweetie!!! I hope you're feelin' better, take care of yourself!!!!


  8. Crate training really isn't horrible for them. We got Dani and Zeke within a day of each other, both as small poopies (no I didn't mis-spell or Freudian-slip that). I had both of them by myself all day and there was no other way to handle them.

    They did like it once they got used to it and they'd rest in the kennels during the day without the door shut a lot.

    Hope this helps, and hugs.

  9. Hey, have you heard anything from tricia yet?

  10. ((sneaking in to blow you a kiss))

  11. Jamie--Tricia's blog has the latest update on Zack--sounds like all went well and he should be home tonight.

    Celti--You guys have been in my thoughts and prayers, and lots of well-wishing vibes have been sent your way as well. We've had our share of bad luck with finances and such of late, but I really think something bad's coming down the pike, and we're all feeling the stress from it. My wife and I both went through tons of stress for no real reason in the two weeks leading up to 9/11, when suddenly it stopped. Neither of us has slept very well, and she's had constant dreams dealing with friends and family members from throughout her life for the past week or so, she's wakened from the dream crying. I really hope all these feelings are wrong, but from past history, I think we all need to be diligent and be ready for any sort of disaster, man-made or natural. Even the animals are feeling it--I know Lexi's new to your home, but our cat's been going nuts of late and we can't figure out why.

    Then again...I could just be losing my mind and imagining all this...:)

  12. Glad that you get to put that mess behind ya.....now I'm hoping the business picks up for ya.....best wishes!!

  13. Well, I'm glad the DHS thing is behind you and hopefully that branch of the family tree! You do need to breathe some though and not let all this stress you out.
    You could think of Lexi as a forced recycling program =)
    If she's used to a crate then save your house. She'll calm down eventually!

  14. Pete - how someone can stoop so low is beyond me. Glad to hear that the girl you mentioned got what she deserved. I was so worried that I, too, would be one of those parents who have their kids taken away despite the fact that they are completely innocent. It will be hard, since he's family, but we're sawing away at that branch of the tree.

    Vince - You're right - I know they do some good, but it has to be so frustrating for them to follow up on all these bogus complaints. The worker said he sees it a lot. Well, I went to bed at the regular time and I'm pooped this morning. We'll see, I guess. In the mean time...coffee!

    Pup - yeah, no doubt! Ya freak.

    Cootera - I'd love to have the opportunity to spit something at you. :p Lexi's been doing fine with the kennel during the day, and far fewer messes to pick up. :)

    Muse - then you know how bad it sucks! What is UP with these people? Well, they'll get theirs. rrrr. I clarified in my post after seeing your comment - crating is what I meant, not actually putting her in a kennel facility. She seems to have no problem with it at all.

    Se7en - You're right about the false reporting, but they can't do that since they allow anonymous reporting - they feel that people won't turn in legit situations as much if they have to be identified. I see their point, but it opens them up to this crap. Yeah, the kid has no idea what he's done. We are the only ones who have ever done squat for him and that is certainly over now. Thanks, sweets!

    Serra - she takes to her crate very well & that's working much better.

    Jamie - yep, it went well and Zach was to come home last night.

    Derek - indeed!

    Aimee - xoxox!

    SpcKnight - aw, thanks hon! You might be right - some of us are more in tune with our instincts than others. I seem to remember a bit of this before 9/11, too, but it could have been just because I had a new baby! lol.

  15. Mike - I certainly hope that's the last we ever hear from them. Business is picking up, let's just hope it stays that way! thanks!

    Seamus - Yep, we're sawing away at that branch. I know, I know...easier said than done. Lexi is helping clear out D's toyboxes a bit. lol! She's doing great in the crate the last couple of days.

  16. I'm still pondering the 'mug shot' comment.....lol....ok.....maybe not 'lol'.....but did manage a snicker.

  17. I'm glad your case is all done and hopfully over with now. Your problems are most probably connected with the stress. If they don't disapate soon, maybe mention it to the doctor... maybe a small dose of valium or something. shrug...

    Can the kennel give you any idea on a behavioral type person for animals? I know it can be corrected...

  18. I also hope karma bites your accuser in the ass. Hard.

    Sometimes the crate is a neccessity. I know it feels wrong, but Lexi will be better off. It will keep her out of possibly dangerous stuff, and she'll recognize the space as her "den." Just give her lots of chewy toys. :)

  19. I echo what E-Lo said about karma biting your accuser's ass (*very* well put!!). Even though you've been dealing with that and many other stressors, it seems like you've kept your humor about you -- GOOD for you! I admire that and it will help you through.