May 20, 2005

SASF - Tootsie Chickenbutt Edition

It's been way too dark and dreary around here (that would be inside my head). It's time for a little fun and goofiness!

Humana Humana
First, we have this little juicy tidbit that is credited for my "guffaw of the day."

As found over at Threadbared
"I don't know if it's the squinty eyes, the butterscotch combover, the manboobs, or his pre queer eye knack for putting together a look that pops, but this Tudor Jerkin guy is H-O-T. That handlebar mustache isn't hurting anything either. And what woman doesn't love a man who sees the world through amber colored glasses? Don't you just want to rip off this stud's belted horizontal ribbed sweater, red tie, pink textured stripe button down, and red lacy corset?" bwaaaahahahaha! Gawd, I love that place.

But WAIT! Could it be a young Captain Kangaroo?


Another Edition of "Wierd Searches that have Found My Blog"
dun dun dun duuuuuuunnnnn. (oh, jeez, I'm really in one of those moods today.)

"tickled me until I peed" - yeah, my sister did that. It wasn't funny - for me.

"I am my own twin" - no I'm not, yes you are, no I'm not, yes you are. SHUT UP!

"live webCAM demon possession" - WTF?

"french erotic film" +pope" - bwaaahahaha! I want to see that!

"sadness" - yeah, too much of that going on here. ENOUGH!

"breast tattoo" - nope, don't have one, probably never will. ouch!

"picking, fleece, 17th century, England" - hey, don't be picking on Fleecey! She's a cool chick!

"masturbate-a-thon +photos" - There were photos? How did I miss that?

"hold you down and kiss you so hard" - ummmm...yeah!

"travelling head" - oh, yes. I am still on the waiting list. tick tock tick tock. I don't know if I'll ever get head.

"neurotically yours pulp fiction thingy" - was there one? Oooh, I have to see that, too!

Come to the DARTH SIDE

I'm still waiting for my chance to see Anakin finally succumb to the evil incarnate that he really is. ...that and to see Natalie Portman pregnant with twins. bwaahahah! No, really - I am looking forward to seeing the new Star Wars. D and I are going this weekend. He is a huge Star Wars fan - I'm sure he'll want to take his super-cool light sabre that lights up and makes that waaaahh waaaaahhh sound. :)

Speaking of Evil
Someone stuck a glazed donut in my face this morning and I ate it. It was gooooood. The people who make such things really should be isolated with all of their axis of evil bakery counterparts on a deserted island where they can all get fat together. Run awaaaaaay!

Thou Shalt Henceforth Be Called...
In the spirit of silliness, I ask that you humor me and do this:
A. Follow the instructions to find your new name.
B. Don't go all adult & hoity toity - leave me a comment with your new name, dangit! ;p

(The following is from a children's book, "Captain Underpants And
the Perilous Plot Professor Poopypants" by Dave Pilkey, in which the
evil Professor forces everyone to assume new names...)

1. Use the third letter of your first name to determine your new first

a = snickle
b = doombah
c = goober
d = cheesey
e = crusty
f = greasy
g = dumbo
h = farcus
i = dorky
j = doofus
k = funky
l = boobie
m = sleezy
n = sloopy
o = fluffy
p = stinky
q = slimy
r = dorfus
s = snooty
t = tootsie
u = dipsy
v = sneezy
w = liver
x = skippy
y = dinky
z = zippy

2. Use the second letter of your last name to determine the first half of your new last name:

a = dippin
b = feather
c = batty
d = burger
e = chicken
f = barffy
g = lizard
h = waffle
i = farkle
j = monkey
k = flippin
l = fricken
m = bubble
n = rhino
o = potty
p = hamster
q = buckle
r = gizzard
s = lickin
t = snickle
u = chuckle
v = pickle
w = hubble
x = dingle
y = gorilla
z = girdle

3. Use the third letter of your last name to determine the second half of your new last name:

a = butt
b = boob
c = face
d = nose
e = hump
f = breath
g = pants
h = shorts
i = lips
j = honker
k = head
l = tush
m = chunks
n = dunkin
o = brains
p = biscuits
q = toes
r = doodle
s = fanny
t = sniffer
u = sprinkles
v = frack
w = squirt
x = humperdinck
y = hiney
z = juice

Thus, for example, George W. Bush's new name is Fluffy Chucklefanny.
Or, using Aimee as an example since she hasn't been commenting here lately (ahem) - she is now Sleezy Bubbledoodle!

Have a wonderful weekend, peeps
- Tootsie Chickenbutt

**UPDATE - 5pm**
I've been laughing about this all damn day. What fun!
So far, we have the following:
Celti – Tootsie Chickenbutt
Noonie - Snickle Frickenhump
JP - Cheesey Dippinsniffer
Cooter - Dumbo Chickentush
ESC - Dumbo Chickenbutt
Just Me - Goober Pottydunkin
Vince - Sloopy Gizzardbutt
Pup – Farcus Wafflebutt
Jamie - Sleezy Dippinbutt
Brighton - Dorky Gizzardlips
Inanna - Snickle Pottytush
Aimee - Sleezy Bubbledoodle
Lovisa - Sneezy Pottylips
Varla - Tootsie Dippenfanny
Helen - Boobie Farklebrains
Tim - Sleezy Dippindoodle
Esther - Tootsie Chuckletush
Myles - Dorky Chucklesniffer
Seamus - Sleezy Farklesniffer
Mike - Sleezy Pottydoodle
Kim - Dorfus Wafflebutt
Happy Funball - Sloopy Chuckledoodle
Tricia - Dorky Chickenlips
Michael - Sleezy Humperdink


  1. This is so silly but it being a Friday afternoon when everyone in the office is a bit giddy anyway, I emailed it round my chums! My name is Boobie Farklebrains. The first part is rather suitable!

  2. Cheesey Dippinsniffer here.

  3. I just love the short attention span Fridays! Have a great weekend, Celti!
    Your friend,
    Dumbo Chickentush

  4. Yee hahahahaha!!! I just did my boss' name. He's Farcus Wafflebutt!

  5. Dumbo Chicken-Butt.


    now worship me for the goddess I am, for introducing you to Threadbared!

    Then go check out Natalie Dee on my side bar - SHE IS MY NEW HERO!

  6. i think for the "hold you down and kiss you so hard" search, the person was probably looking for sarah mclachlan's song called "possession" which is a great song :)

    thanks for visiting my blog, celti. i appreciate your comments and i hope to see you again soon!

  7. I am now: Goober Pottydunkin.


  8. I too will be seeing Star Wars tonight. Instead of Vince, you may call me Sloopy Gizzardbutt. My kids would get a kick out of it (They would be Dorfus and Goober Gizzrdbutt). My poor wife is Boobie Gizzrdbutt. I'm not sure she'd appreciate it since she really isn't boobie and is kind of sensitive about it.

    BTW, my kids LOVE Captain Underpants.

  9. Sleezy Dippindoodle

  10. Ah, fridays are so much better with you in the blogland!

    Signed: Sleezy Dippinbutt (Yes, I have the joy of having two a's in a row in my last name!)

  11. Dorky Lipsgizzard here. Gah.

  12. And YES they are MY real LIPS!!!

  13. Snickle Pottytush here... this rocks. I laughed soo hard!!!!

  14. Whoa, I'm Farcus Wafflebutt. I didn't know I was Cootera's boss. Sweet.

    Cootera, you can go home for the day :)

    I love captain underpants too!

  15. Tootsie Chickenbutt already outed me. Damn.

    Sorry for the lack o'comments. I'm back. :)


  16. I just blew rice from my burrito all over my keyboard over that first guy. Those chicas at ThreadBared fuckin' rock. Hugs.

    Tootsie DippenFanny

  17. What a great post!

    Dorky Chucklesniffer

  18. Yay!! Farcus Wafflebutt gave me the rest of the day off!! (Too bad I didn't notice until half hour before, though...) Thanks, Pup!!

  19. I just wanna be known as Humperdink.

  20. Dorky Chickenlips

    There is something just SO wrong with this!

  21. Who else thinks these make the ensemble complete?

    Sloopy Chuckledoodle. I think it suits me.

  22. i am dorfus wafflebutt... :) kim

  23. Noonie, JP, Just Me, Tim, Count Choc, Esther, Myles, Kim - thanks for playing! :)

    Helen - That's what Fridays are for! Hope they enjoyed it.

    Cootera - I do too. You too, Dumbo. *snicker* LMAO @ the boss name!

    ESC - much worship coming your way. I'll do that!

    No Milk - I'm sure it is. I posted those lyrics not too long ago. Awesome song. I'll be back to visit you! - now what's yer Capn' underpants name??

    Sloopy - lol @ the kids names - the wife, yeah, that's a little iffy.

    Jamie - why, thank you! Yours is a hoot!

    Brighton - I think that's Gizzardlips. *snicker*. SURE they are... ;)

  24. Nanner - thanks. I've been getting some serious giggles out of it.

    Pup - Farcus Wafflebutt - bwaaahahaha! That's awesome. Be nice to Cooter.

    Aimee - I know where you've been. ;) *smooch*

    Varla - hi sweetie! Isn't she a hoot!? Isn't he a hunk? Sorry about the rice. ew.

    Michael - okey dokey, Humperdink.

    Tricia - so wrong, but so right! lol

    happyfunball - oh, those are perfect! lol

  25. sleezy pottydoodle

    oh the shame of that

  26. I think "Chucklesniffer" is the best last name EVER!

  27. Um, where'd it all go?

    You ok?