m Celtic Cross Celtic Cross - Average Everyday Sane Psycho Supergoddess

March 31, 2005

The Swirling Vortex

I am in a very pensive mood today. It has carried over somewhat from yesterday, but with a more positive, dreamy twist. Add a dash of sleep deprivation, and you get the swirling vortex that is my thoughts.

Prompted to focus on dreams and fantasy, I have been contemplating what I really want out of life. I’m talking about goals here...what is really important. Like driving out the impurities that prevent me from feeling complete inner peace.

A line from yesterday’s post is a driving force – "I don’t want to sell my life for money." Of course, you can’t live without money, but it is not what is important - relationships are. Relationships with the people you love, the people you care about and those who are important to you – and, more predominantly, your relationship with yourself. Can you look in the mirror and love yourself? I’m not talking about loving how you look, but loving yourself. Knowing that you are a good person, and that you are worthy of love, affection, respect and kindness.

I was once told that you can not really ever love someone until you love yourself. So many would dispute that. I can see what they meant – I would say that you can not be effective at loving someone if you don't.

Only you can truly make yourself happy. Of course, outside influences have a major impact on this, but the peace and tranquility have to come from within. You have to take control of your situation and make what you can of it. You know what they say, if life gives you lemons...

I really don't know where I'm going with this...just following the patterns of the thoughts that are swirling around. The thunderstorm is still going on in there, bolts of lightening sparking ideas.

What do you do if you have one foot buried in the concrete of your current life and suddenly something calls to you? Do you chew off that foot to pursue it? Smash the concrete of your current situation and toss it aside, setting yourself free? Would it be a mistake? Would you regret it forever if you didn't? You'll never know unless you try.

I’ve always believed that you can’t ever really succeed without taking risks – without sticking that proverbial neck out there.

Give me a sledgehammer.
(update - upon hearing that my comments are farked up, I turned blogger comments (over to the right) back on...)

4 Comments:

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